Fast forward to the end of my workday: I’m calmly packing up my desk, putting things away and (you know what’s coming) what do I see just chillin’ in the spot I’d last left it? Yep, the marker was there the whole time, but I literally could not see it earlier.
It never ceases to amaze me that it is when I am not
frantically looking for something that I always seem to find it.
Yes, I’m referring to tangible objects like pens, books, keys; but, I’m also referring to intangibles that we deeply desire: love, career fulfillment, respect. How many times have you heard a friend say something like "I met my sweetie on my way out of the gym, in sweats and a ponytail." Or "I was on my afternoon stroll when I got the idea for the business I now have." I’m sure you could list many of your own experiences.
What is the phenomenon that literally blinds us from the stuff we want that just so happens to be right in front of our faces? Where the #$%@ is it?!? we exclaim as our blood pressure rises and our hopes plummet. How did that dry erase marker disappear from plain sight? How do we not interact with the potential lovers that cross our paths all the time? How do we remain in jobs for so long that we don’t like, never catching wind of the dream gig that’s just one degree removed from us?
I don’t have the be-all-end-all answer. What I do know, however, is that there is a formula, a science for how stuff I’ve wanted HAS panned out for me in the past.
Desire + relaxed energy about it + good spirits = Voila! Here it is.
What trips me up and gets in my way are expectations about and attachments to what it should look like, who it should be with, how it should get here and how long it should take to get here. Then I worry if it’ll ever be mine when one or more of these parameters isn’t met, saying stuff like “Sh%^, well if it ain’t here yet, then Judas Priest perhaps it never will get here.” Not constructive.
What is helpful instead? Here are a few actions that work for me:
• Acknowledging my disappointment and just letting myself feel it without judgment.
• Catching the “never will-should have already-poor me” stories that run around the terrain
of my mind. Then delivering the catch to the Universe for safekeeping, or better yet,
metamorphosis and mindshifting
• Steering my mind back to the stuff in my life I can appreciate and making gratitude lists
• Focusing my attention and energy on helping someone else
• Talking or journaling to my higher self
• Letting intuition and inspired action be my guides as to what to do next about the stuff I
want and need
Despite what I think and how I act sometimes, life is not an emergency. I don’t have to figure everything out stat. As Marianne Williamson says in her book The Law of Divine Compensation, the Universe is self-organizing and self-correcting. My fulfillment and success are already built in to universal programming. If the Universe has my back then surely, there is no need to fret. Though I sometimes forget.
To sum it up…
Mindset: Unless I look frantically and make this happen now, then it will never happen and my needs and wants won’t be taken care of.
Mindshift: If I can relax long enough and take actions with grace and ease, I’m that much more likely to find what I have sought.
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